OOHHHH MMMYYY! i dont know where to start!!!! The last few days have been soo full of fun suprises and many answered prayer!!!!

As i sed in my last post, we had an ordination in our church this weekend! I had requested to especially pra tht i cud be at church fri. eve. an sun. morn. an eve. Well not only was i at church fri eve but i also went to watch the youth pla vbal afterwards!!! it was sooo much fun an jus what i needed.!!! i was aslo at church sun morn an eve. thnks grandma an granpa for coming an bein my driva!!!:) had a bit of a struggle with gettin my hair to cooperate but with a lil help frm frends an fam i had them up altho they threatened to fall down quite a few times! it was just what i needed an thnks everyone for overlooking the way i looked an makin me feel so accepted. ALLLL the encouragement i recieved wow words cannot express my gratitude!!! For those of you who didn't find out, Ivan Stoltzfus was ordained! I have no doubt that he will do a good job! Thanks again Ivan (an family) for the encouragement you hav been to me! You are in my thoughts an prayers!!! =)

Now for the shocker!!! I had a dr appointment this morn again an she was pleased with the progress shr saw especially with my walking! Thanks for all the prayers, my walking does seem to be much better. It still works best if I have someone or something to hang on to!! but anywa the shocker..... We got bac frm the dr visit around 12 or so. I was feeling quite good and was jus bored stiff! around three thirty i got this notion that I want to go shopping!!!=) my hold back was my hair soooo i decided im gana see wat i can do! welll i got my band in an tried rather unssucfully to get them up tight enough.:( soooo mom bless her heart came to my aide!! thanks mom i luv u! I put the band in an rested my head on my hands bout like i used to do wen i was a lil squirt!!!=) my head actuallly held still enough for her to put them up in a bob!!!! All i can say is God was answering prayer! We serve such a BIG God an yet He cares about every tiny detail of our lives!!! Ok so Colleen an i leave with plans 2 stop at k-mart an depending how it goes there we will decide if we can go anywhere else! Well since my walking is still hardly good enough to actually walk around in a store she went an got a wheel-chair and off we went!!!=) Im sure we got quite the stares but well u jus sorta do wat u gotta do!! Till it was all sed an done we had been at k-mart, khols, target, and 5-below!!! I had a trip an cudnt help but laugh at the few minor misshaps!!! The funniest was def at target. We decided that we wud get a basket for me to hold on my lap so things wudnt fall off my lap so often....anywa Mom wanted us to get a six pack thing of paper towels and a big bag of dog food!!! So there we were, Colleen had her hands full with pushing me around so of course we didnt hav a cart. oh yes an Colleen had seen one of those big body pillows so i told her i wud get it for her birthday!=) sooooo there we were this big pillow kinda behind me an i wuz sorta resting my head on it. but help we hav this huge bag of dog food tht we needed sooo she put that on my lap then put the basket with a few small items plus the big 6-pack paper towel half in half out of the basket on top of the dog food. We were only a little overloaded!!!!=) ha ha!!! i just laughed but poor Colleen i think she was a little embarrased! bless her heart she didnt say too much! ohhh myyy sigh i think if we ever do tht agan we will take a third person to push a cart!!!!! lol! anyway it got me out of the house an i wuz able to get a few things that I wanted...needed!!!

its so much fun getting out more and things definetly are better than they had been!!! I don't know where all God is going to take me in this journey yet but I know He has a plan for everything He allows and He will be right beside me thru it all!!!

Just a quick post....

Lord willing we will be having an ordination this weekend. I would REALLY like to be there Friday night an Sunday morning and evening! I am just going to ask you all to pray that I could be there. My biggest hold-bac is my hair. It is very hard to get them up tight enough that they stay up. Also, please pray that my body could relax!

I do have an appointment with a therapist of some kind tomorrow, please pray that that would go well. I have been having some back pain (i think it comes from the weird position my body is in when i walk). I'm hoping the treatment tomorrow will help that at least a little.

I do have some good news too!!!:) I discovered that swimming is good therapy!!! :) Went with some of the youth girls yesterday, was a little sore last night which was no surprise since I used used muscles that most likely didnt get used much for 2 months or so!!! Hoping to do it some more in the near future!:)

I would also like to ask you all to continue to pray for my friend Andrea Wagler and her family. She also has lymes.

uh-oh guess this got a little longer than i expected but just know that i appreciate everything that everyone does for me. Sometimes I feel so unworthy but I pray God will richly bless each and everyone for what you do for me! :)

Wow!!! We serve an AWESOME GOD!!!! :)

I was at church yesterday!!! :) went after sunday school an sat in the back on a rocking chair!!! It was sooo good 2 be there and it went pretty good! Didnt feel quite as relaxed as I felt at Shari's wedding but wow made me realize how very much I missed!!! Was so good to hear a GOOD message on Father's Day an made it even more special because dad was the preacher!!! :) I love you dad!!! Was good to sing with the church family again!!! :) It was so much fun being around people again!! Thanks everyone for all the encouragement!!! I cant IMAGINE wat it would be like if i didnt have a church family!!!!

As for an update on my health... I was officially diagnosed with lymes so plan 2 meet with a lymes specialist July 19. I am also scheduled to meet with my neurologist next Monday so not sure wat all that will involve. Still many unanswered questions but feels like were at least getting a little somewhere!!! Also seems like my walking still has not improved a lot but I know that God, in His timing will bring healing!:)

I feel so blessed that I have soooo many caring friends and family! Please don't stop praying I know without a shadow of a doubt its the prayers of my friends and family that keep me going. I have def had my share of days wen everything looked so overwhelming... but I am amazed how God ALWAYS knows just wat I need! :)

I have plans to go to my friend Shari's house for a while tomorrow....really looking forward to that. :)

The next few months I have quite a few appointments with different doctors and specialists. So altho I have no idea where all this will take me, I know God does and He will give me ALL I need to face each battle!!!!! :)

yes, yes i know its time to update again....!!!

The past few days hav been really good for me. I was actually sitting on a chair more than laying in bed! In fact wasnt in my hospital bed at all 2 day!!!! Also been spending more time outside too!!! There's something about looking up into the big blue sky with big puffy white clouds that i just LOVE!!!! It makes me feel so close to God! The past few days i have been thinking a lot about ALL the pain and grief in this world! There soooo many people out there who are hurting...my heart just aches when I think of the many people who have no idea what its like to feel the joy and peace God gives to those who allow Him to control their lives!!! I could just cry when I think of all the dear little chilren who don't know wat its like to be loved. I just wish i cud wrap them all up in a big hug!!! I just have to over and over again commit them to my Heavenly Father.

As far as an update... right now we're just kinda waiting. I got the results back from the limes test. I guess they test for three things at the lab in California lab. They said two things they tested for came back negative but it did show that their is an infection in my body. Dad called and wanted to talk to the dr. but they said they can't tell him anything until i give them permission since I'm 18 and considered an adult! I called them and gave them the ok so they had to fax papers that I had to sign... sigh.... such a rig-a-ma-ro =). So dad called and wanted to talk to the dr to find out where the infection is and what his reccomendation would be but oh my no the dr is only available wed. an thurs.!!!! Oh an to complecate things a little more we decided to test for limes the medical way whereas the other one was more on the natural side. We got the results for that back today an it came back clear!!! =) another big sigh.... soooo not sure wats gana happen there.... I do have an appointment with my 'second opinion' doctor the end of the month. Also am scheduled to go to NYC July 9 since they have some of the worlds best doctors when it comes to dealing with dystonia. My 'second opinion' doctor referred us to them an actually got her training there. Believe me i'm so thankful for doctors an all when we need them but me o my will i ever be happy once this is all behind me!!!=)

Having said all that I really do have a lot to be thankful for!!!! There are lots o people out there who have it much worse! An when I think how I was a few weeks ago i realize that some things definatly have improved.!=)

Thanks for all your prayers I don't even want to think of where I would be without prayer. Please continue praying that my walking would improve! I would also like to add a special prayer request for my friend Andrea Wagler who is also facing some health problems.

I really have no idea what God has in mind for my life but I DO know that He has a purpose for this and I want Him to receive ALL the glory!

ok so tonight instead of crying all my blues im going to see how many blessings or day brightners I can think of..... =)
1. i felt pretty good this morning when i woke up (which it is not always that way)
2. i have parents and siblings who will do all they can to make me more comfortable... i luv all of u very much!=)
3. i have sooooo many friends and family who really care about me
4. i was able to enjoy being outside for a while this morning-it was so peacful and quiet i cant really explain it but i luvd it
5. i am able to sit up more instead of always laying in bed
6. my movements are definetly better than they were at one time
7. so far i havn't had any real bad side effects from the medication since i am slowly building up 2 the full amount
8. swallowing the pills seemed to be easier today
9. i still feel pretty good and sleep well
10. i dont hav any real severe pain
11. i know there are people all over this world praying for me =)
12. i am able to be at home instead of laying in a hospital somewhere
13. and MOST IMPORTANT..... i have a Heavenly Father who is always here with me!!!!=)
*** a few of the day brightners from the last couple days
1. last evening my 5 year old cuzin called and her and her sister sang a song that i taught them wen they were here last week----i luv u diane and dericka!
2. my dear little sister picked a pretty pink rose and gave it to me with a note... i luv u carmella
****** those were just a few!!!!=) oh and all the cards, flowers, emails, comment on my blog posts or fb, and text messages! (even got a few texts from my grandpa). it all means more than words could ever say!!!!
~wana add a quote yet....* Prayer is more than a wish-list to God, its a conversation in which we interact with Him!!!!*
Oh and if you want something specific to pray about... pray that my walking would improve

bigger than all the shadows that fall across my path, God is bigger than any mountain that i can or cannot see.... bigger than my confusion, bigger than anything, God is bigger than any mountain that i can or cannot see......bigger than all my problems bigger than all my fears, God is bigger than any mountain that I can or cannot see... bigger than all my questions bigger than any thing, God is bigger than any mountain that I can or cannot see.... bigger than all the giants of fear and unbelief, God is bigger than any mountain that I can or cannot see, bigger than all my hang-ups bigger than anything, God is bigger than any mountain that I can or cannot see.... bigger than all my problems, bigger than all my fears, God is bigger than any mountain that I can or cannot see.... bigger than all my questions, bigger than anything, God is bigger than any mountains that I can or cannot see.......
- I really like this song and am sooo thankful that God IS bigger than any mountain that I can or cannot see!!! I especially like the phrase where it says 'bigger than my confusion'! Right now I am just so tired of not knowing! It just seems so big and overwhelming! It feels like such a roller-coaster and I just want OFF!!!! Its just soooo confusing. I am so tired of going to the dr., I am tired of laying around, Iam tired of taking tests and waiting for the results, I just want life to be NORMAL again!!
- I am so blessed tho to have so many people who care and most of all I am thankful that I have someone to lean on, Someone who is much bigger than this problem and I am thankful for the peace and joy He gives when I just allow Him to take control.
-Thanks again for all the prayers and encouragment, I know that is the Only thing that keeps me going!

Here is a little paragraph I read out of the book called 'His Princess'
My Princess its ok to cry... I see how hard you try to handle your heart, and I know you want to live a life without heartaches or pain. I'm asking you to take a step closer to your Father in Heaven by crying out to me when you hurt. Let me heal you. Remember, My chosen, King David? He cried out me in his fears, dissapointments, and sin, and I answered. You are also My chosen one, you are My daughter.... so its ok to cry. I don't expect you to pretend pain is not real. It is truth and tears that will give you the freedom that I want you to know. Now let go of that part of your heart that only I can heal. Let your heavenly Daddy hold you while you cry!
-It brought tears to my eyes when I read that! It seems the devil knows when I feel weak and He uses so many things to pull me away from God. It can be so easy just to believe him and allow him to steal my joy and peace! :( But I KNOW that My God is much much bigger and stronger and He will send the devil away if I call out to Him!!! I'm FAR from perfect and God is still working in my life, molding and shaping me to be all he wants me to be, and yes sometimes it hurts, sometimes it hurts real bad but I know with all my heart He is right beside me no matter where I am and I trust He knows whats best, neither will He allow anything to come my way that He will not walk me thru!!! Please pray that I could hold tightly to His hand wherever He takes me!!! Also pray that when I am temted to do things I shouln't that I would cry out to God for help....especially in my thought life since I have so much time to think! My prayer is that this time of trial will draw me closer to the only one who can truly heal me! ;)